Dear teachers! In this article, we will analyze how to correctly communicate with people who start talking about their psychological traumas received during the war. You will learn how to properly support them and behave accordingly in such situations. We hope you will find this post helpful!
If during the lesson a person opens up to you and talks about his traumatic experience, then there are several options for answers: the first is to say that you hear him and offer to talk about it with a psychologist for professional help; the second is empathy.
Empathy is probably the best way you can apply. Sometimes this is almost the only thing we can do for such a person. It must be remembered that empathy is not about feeling sorry for someone, because in this case a person will feel like a victim, and this position is inactive; it's not about patience, you shouldn't say "endure till it passes" to such a child, because if you bear with it, it won't get better in any way; the tension may pass, but what is destroyed in the soul will not be restored in any way. Empathy is about being on the same wavelength with a person, being with them in their experiences.
If you choose to be an empath, you can skip one lesson by supporting a person. In this way, you will be able to ease the person's condition, because if he/she told you exactly this, it means the trust and desire of the person to be around.
Of course, you may not know what he/she was feeling in such terrible moments, but in the person's experiences you can be there for him/her, allowing him/her to speak, and you in turn are in the position of an attentive listener, sometimes without even saying anything, in sincere presence near.
It is not necessary to ask to talk about a traumatic experience. Especially children and teenagers with stress disorder can find it difficult to speak about it.
During the conversation, try to create a safe and calm environment. Speak slowly and be sure to pause so that your partner has time to understand and you have time to control your feelings.
Remember (if your student is still a child): a child does not know how to control his/her emotions. In case the child even begins to cry, do not be afraid if you also have tears. You don't need to keep them in yourself and maintain an "adult position". Not crying is not the position of a strong person, it is a rather false stereotype. If you are about to cry, give yourself a chance to do so. For the child, it will be a kind of grieving moment, which must be carried out. You should not skip this stage, it is quite useful and will happen sooner or later. Grieving is about loss. If the child in your presence felt a fairly safe environment where he had the opportunity to cry, this means the highest degree of trust, because people do not show their tears to everyone.
Everything sums up to the fact that we are present at what is happening to a person. Our presence gives an opportunity to express him/herself, his/her feelings and experiences, inner world, to talk, to cry. Such a manifestation of trust builds a kind of "security platform" for people in the future, because their security was lost, taken away, destroyed, and now they will build such a non-threatening environment again. And you will be present at this, take part in it.
We hope this article was indeed helpful and you will use our tips for talking to traumatized people.